Stevie Scorpion’s Sort-Route Morning Muffins
Stevie Scorpion, our heroic substitute carrier, sends muffins the way Stevie sorts mail: by size, optimism, and a little crunch.
What landed in my mailbox
“Oat flour, mashed banana, one egg, a handful of chopped dates, pinch of cinnamon. Bake 375°F twelve minutes — they should fit in a satchel without crumbling. Mail is just long-distance hello; muffins are the postcard.”
I overfilled the cups once and learned about “structural integrity,” postal style. Second batch: tidy domes, golden edges, zero crumbs on the porch step.
Carl’s verdict: Four and a half stars — half point docked because I ate three before photographing. Portable, earnest, and not too sweet — like Rural Route 4 before coffee.
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